How to Flirt on Phone with Your Partners

24 SIMPLE PHONE USE RULES FOR COUPLES:  

1. Don't make a habit of putting your phone on silent mode or turning it off each time you're with your partner. It makes you look like you are hiding something. 

2. Save your partner's phone number using a special title like "Hubby", "Love", "Wife",  "Sweetie". Or save using a title plus the official name. Using the official name only makes your partner look like just the other contacts on your phone.

3. Answer your partner's phone call with loving affectionate words like "Hi love", "Hey honey". How a conversation starts determines how it flows. If you start warm, you two will enjoy talking with each other on phone.
 
4. End the talk on a high. Say "I love you", say a joke, a compliment, a warm phrase before you hang up. Hang up with a smile.
 
5. It is OK to chat with friends online. But never chat with another person more than you chat with your partner
 

6. If you will be busy, notify your partner you will not be able to pick up calls or reply texts promptly. Inform your partner what you will be doing and approximately for how long. This prepares your partner and brings peace because your partner will not feel ignored.
 
7. Flirting on phone is good but only flirt with your partner.
 
8. Tell off people who try to flirt with you, entice you and charm you on phone. Let them know that you are taken
 
9. Take lots of photos and videos together to capture moments. You will need those pics and videos in future as you look back
 
10. When you go out on dates, keep the phone away, minimize phone use so that you focus on each other.
 
11. Don't make a habit of walking away from your partner to answer phone calls. Your partner will perceive you are hiding something or having an affair. Love is about perception.
 
12. After the date and you don't live together; man, call her up and check on her, tell her you got home safe; lady, send him a text, thanking him for a wonderful time.
 
13. Unless it's an emergency, when you can't reach your partner and you probably know he/she is at work or doing something; don't keep calling and texting desperately. It may look like you do not trust your partner, or that you are suspecting him or her, You will only look like a nag to your partner and that will make your partner detest phone contact with you. Relax, your partner will see your missed call and text back.
 
14. When you see a missed call or text from your partner, please call back or reply as soon as you can. Put your partner at ease.
 
15. Save your partner's phone number as an emergency number to be contacted in case something happens to you and your phone is locked.

Why Should Let Go 'The Secret' of Secret Relationships

The Secret of secret relationships and why you should let go

The number one reason for secret relationship is fear. When an individual in afraid of the responsibility of love, he will likely want to keep it secret. When a lady is afraid of the outcome of his love, she will likely keep it secret. When an individual is afraid of what someone, parents, or a group of persons will say about the relationship, they will likely keep it secret. The greatest revelation from secret relationships is found in wrong timing, expressed by lack of courage, demonstrated by absence of purpose and responsibility, and/or a hidden agenda to just suck this orange and throw it away, in what I can hit-and-run love accident. Before you can master the act of secret relationship, you must embrace hypocrisy, in addition to a gifted specialty in lying and cover-up.

If the way I relate with you when we are inside the cover of a house, is different from the way I relate with you when we are outside the house, then there is something wrong about the relationship. If when we are outside with my friends, you are not my partner and just a friend, but when we talk on phone or inside the house, you transform into my sweetheart, then that is hypocrisy, and all hypocrites are liars, and all liars shall find their place in the pit of Hell!

If a secret relationship is genuine, then let it pass the test of sincerity. Let them bring it out to the open. If it is genuine and of true love, then let it pass the test of accountability. Let them bring it under proper supervision of a grounded mentor and not just to tell your best friend about it. If a secret relationship has a future, then let it demonstrate maturity and not revolve around sex. Let it never be a platform for the superficial excuses of romance without responsibility. If a man truly loves you and wants to make you his wife, and not his whore, then he should stand up to it, introduce your properly to his friends, family, mentor and pastors.

If a man is ashamed of you before God and men, then tell him you are single but not stupid. Don't fall into the excuse of "I'm not ready yet, let's take it slow." If he is not ready and what is slow, why is he fast with words of love and demand for sex, please tell him that you are single but not stupid. If she is reluctant to accept your proposal and request to see her people, and yet she keeps demanding money from you, please tell her that you are not an ATM machine, that you are single but not stupid.

Hmm, secret relationships? We have graduated from secret friends, to secret relationships, to secret lovers, to secret sex, to secret BELLE to secret abortions, then SUDDENLY we want OPEN BLESSINGS. Na lie!!! God is not mocked. Whatever a man or woman sows, they must reap!

THE JOURNEY OF A KISS

A kiss is a show of affection. Kissing ranges from a gentle touch of a cheek to another cheek, or from a lip to a cheek, to a nose or to another lip. Kissing may go beyond this to a lip to lip caressing until tongue to tongue contacts, saliva exchange, and is often backed up with deep caressing of hand movements to other parts of the body. So the first question, we need to tackle is which kissing are we referring to, and what's the purpose of each type of kissing, and more importantly, where does it lead to?

A young man once told me, "I've kissed my girl friend on her cheek like thrice...and those times it was to show my affection...but now we're talking about the lip to lip, and the reason for that will also be to show my affection for her without leading to sex or touching other parts of the body.....just lip to lip kiss."

I like the phrase, "...JUST LIP TO LIP KISS.." It sounds so innocent and inviting. It shows no harm and certainly, no death. It wraps itself in a bliss of curiosity and a longing to explore ancient wonders. But I knew its lurking danger, hidden within its basement of desire and so I asked him, "Young man, you've kissed her on her cheek, not once, but thrice. So what affection have you shown from the lip to cheek that you feel should be INCREASED to lip to lip? Why aren't you content with lip to cheek?"
No clear answer returned.
But we both knew the answer. 

He wanted more. The cheeks were no longer as tantalizing as the first time. The cheeks weren't producing the sensation that thrilled his curiosity. He wanted more. He needed more. It was only human to desire an UPGRADE. Shouldn't this kiss be allowed to continue its journey?

9 WAYS TO MAKE EX JEALOUS

HOW TO MAKE YOU EX FEEL USELESS AND DESPERATE

1. Whenever he/she calls just pick their call and inform them about your achievement and never give them a chance to reconcile, never abuse them.

2. You should never block them or unfriend them in facebook, and always update on your happy moments and avoid updating on your miseries.

3. Be close to their friends so that he/she can feel more jealous.

4. Never call their relatives.

5. Whenever you meet them on the road greet them and wish them well but never give them much time, always look jovial.


6. Never be the one calling them.

7. If they try to make advances, say NO with capital letters and tell them to mind their own business.

8. Improve on your dressing and personal appearance, once they see you they might even commit suicide.

9. Date someone who has achieved more than him/her and who is more  handsome/beautiful than them.

HOW PARADIGM IS FORMED

Eight monkeys were put in a room. In the middle of the room is a ladder, leading to a bunch of bananas hanging from a hook on the ceiling. Each time a monkey tries to climb the ladder, all the monkeys are sprayed with ice water, which makes them miserable. Soon enough, whenever a monkey attempts to climb the ladder, all of the other monkeys, not wanting to be sprayed, set upon him and beat him up. Soon, none of the eight monkeys ever attempts to climb the ladder.

One of the monkeys is then removed, and a new monkey is put in the room. Seeing the bananas and the ladder, he wonders why none of the other monkeys are doing the obvious. But undaunted, he immediately begins to climb the ladder. All the other monkeys fall upon him and beat him silly. He has no idea why. However, he no longer attempts to climb the ladder.

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A second monkey is removed and replaced. The newcomer again attempts to climb the ladder, but all the other monkeys hammer the crap out of him. This includes the previous new monkey, who is grateful that he’s not on the receiving end this time, participates in the beating because all the other monkeys are doing it. However, he has no idea why he’s attacking the new monkey. One by one, all the first eight monkeys are replaced. Eight new monkeys are now in the room. None of them have ever been sprayed by ice water. None of them attempt to climb the ladder. All of them will enthusiastically beat up any new monkey who tries, without having any idea why.

And that is how traditions, religions and systems get established and followed. Think twice before following a tradition, religion or system blindly.. It would make more sense if you get your own understanding to it

DON'T JUDGE TOO QUICKLY

EVERY FACE YOU SEE IS FACING SOMETHING

Last week, I was at a bank to use A.T.M. Two men were there. At of the two of them, one was sneezing and coughing at the same time. I pitied him and I was saying ' bless you sir, take care sir' and all those sympathizing words. I observed that the other man that was with us was not even saying anything. I was like, hope this man will be a caring fellow like this? How can someone be sneezing and coughing like this beside you with water almost coming at of his eyes and you can't even utter a word to show your human feeling! 

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The man that was sneezing looked at me and looked at the man and he said, 'this man is so uncaring. He can't even show sympathy....' I told him not to bother.
Few minutes later, this second man who did not say anything, came to meet the one sneezing and was asking him something by using sign language. It was then we both realized that the man is both deaf and dumb. So even if you are sneezing from morning till night, he is not hearing it. 

As he was trying to ask us something by using hand to describe, we could not understand what he was asking. We could not give him accurate answer and I can see anger or sense of feeling bad written all over him and I know he might be seeing us as 'wicked ' people for not been able to provide answer to his problem just as we were seeing him when he could not sympathize with the other man. 

You know what I learnt from that incident that day?, it further confirmed that saying you see as the title of this post 'Every face you see is facing something' Don't be too quick to think people don't want to help you, people don't want to give you what you request for, people don't want to visit you, people don't want to check on you, etc. If you know what people are passing through, you might eventually pity them and conclude that, your situation is better than theirs. Can you compare coughing and sneezing with deafness and dumbness? 

Take it easy on people. Don't be too quick to judge people. Remember, every face you see, no matter how beautiful , handsome, glowing, or radiant the face might look, that face is facing something. Be kind. Be good and Be nice to everyone around you. As you are facing your own, people are facing their own. Don't expect too much from people. Always remember, every face you see is facing something!

BIG WEDDING OR STRONG MARRIAGE

"Dad, can you loan me Five Hundred Thousand Naira?" Kola asked his father.

"What for son?", his father asked.

"For my wedding.

By our calculations, we're falling short meeting the cost".

Kola had come to meet his parents with his fiancé.

"Your wedding? How much is the total cost of the wedding?", his father asked.

"N3.6 million. We're thinking of starting the committee next week. We can together give about eight hundred thousand and expect our friends to help us raise about two million. I remember you told me if ever I need help I can come to you" Kola answered.

His father held him by the shoulder and said "Go get your wife and come meet me at my study room".

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"Yes dad", Kola obliged.

Minutes later, Kola and his fiancé, Tomilayo walked into his father's study room.

"Having a good time my daughter?" Kola's father asked.

"Yes I am. You and your wife are so hospitable. I pray that Kola and I can emulate your marriage. You are an admirable couple" answered Kola's fiance.

"Thank you. I am delighted to have you as my daughter. This is your home, you're welcome anytime", said father.

They sat down.

"Thank you dad"

"So, I hear you want to spend N3.6 million for your wedding and you need me to help with five hundred thousand?", asked father.

"Yes, we will greatly appreciate" said the fiancé.

"The wedding will be at the Total Garden Ibadan in about six months time", said Kola.

"Why do you want to have a big wedding?", father asked.

"Well, it's our big day. She's always dreamt of a big wedding", Kola replied.

"Have you dreamt of a big wedding or a strong marriage?", The father asked the fiancé.

"When you put it that way, it's more of a strong marriage" said the fiancé.

"Good. You've answered wisely. So who do you expect to come for your wedding?", asked the father.

"Friends and relatives. About seven hundred people", answered Kola.

"How many true friends do you really have?", I mean friends who have been tried and tested to be there for you through thick and thin?, asked the father.

Kola and Tomilayo looked at each other.

"Countable", the fiancé answered.

"So who are these other people who will come to your wedding?", asked the father.

Silence.

"OK. Let's go to the relatives. I know you love your relatives, but how many are really close to you? You barely talk with the many relatives you have", said the father.

"What are you trying to say dad?" asked Kola.

"My son, my daughter; why do you want to spend N3.6 million on a wedding, a one day event yet you need the money in your marriage? Look, you are actually coming to ask me for money, you will form a committee to ask people for money; all to show off and please people who will not even matter in your marriage"

Silence.

5 MATES YOU MUST MARRY

One of the ways your marriage will not add to the rate of divorce in our world today is for you to marry your mate and if you are married already, make your spouse your mate!

You see that statement of ' Am I your mate?' does not apply in marriage. You must marry your mate. I will like to talk on seven dimensions you and the person you want to marry or you have married must be mate.

1. MARRY YOUR SPEAKING MATE

Marry someone you can speak together and understand each other. Communication is very crucial in marriage. Don't marry someone that, when you are saying 'A' he or she will be saying ' Z' Once there is dichotomy in your speaking and understanding level, you can't enjoy that marriage. So many men go to bar to hang out with friends and gist till 11pm because they know their wives can't engage in any meaningful intellectual discussion. So many women too prefer to hang out with their friends, because they know their husbands mentality when it comes to vital issues and discussions is very low. Marry your speaking Mate.

2. MARRY YOUR SCHOOL MATE

By this I mean, marry someone you can learn together and improve together. Don't marry ' Mr Know all' or 'Miss Know all'. Don't marry someone who is rigid and not open to new ideas, new ways of doing things, or new innovations. Marriage is a great institution. From day one till death do you part, you will keep learning. Marry your 'school' mate; someone who is ready to learn with you.

3.  MARRY YOUR SPENDING MATE

Don't marry someone who is stingy. There are so many expenses to cater for in marriage. A stingy guy in courtship won't suddenly become a generous husband in marriage. Don't marry a lady that has the financial philosophy of ' My husband's money is our money, but my money is my money'. Marry someone who believes in dignity of labour , who is ready to work, not a lazy fellow who just want to be a consumer and not a contributor. Marry someone who is ready to spend and be spent for the growth and success of the family.

AGE DOES NOT DEFINE MATURITY

Never venture into a relationship when you are not mature. Maturity in this sense is not only about age but to be mentally, emotionally, physiologically, spiritually, financially and socially fit. 

You might be rich, even of age but yet can't make decisions, your friends are still the one pushing you to do things, little wonder why friends have misled others in taking a destructive decision that ruin their marriage.
 

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Some don't know that after marriage, friends and relatives (especially singles) will class you and relate with you in a different way, because they gonna respect your new status, but if you are not socially fit you get depressed and feel rejected.
If you can't control your emotions- anger, lust, desires- yet, don't even think of marriage but rather work on it until you are no longer controlled by it.

STOP MEASURING AGAINST OTHERS

A lot of times, consciously or unconsciously, we sabotage our lives by comparison.

“John is doing that, and Sarah is working there."

"Paul is in the news, and Zack is a hotshot. And see my life. Miserable!”

You’re right. But your life is only miserable because in your mind it is.

The foolishness of trying to measure up to others is in the fact that there is no end to your failure to succeed. Just when you think you have measured up to some person(s), there would always be some others ahead of you. As long as your reference is someone else, you will always feel less. There will always be someone better than that person in some way. In comparing ourselves with everyone else, we shoot for many goal posts, never hitting any.

Comparison with others is a deadly two-edged sword, each side of the sword dangerous to the one who wields it. There are always two groups of people on your comparison spectrum: The ones you are better than and the ones that are better than you. And no matter what your parameters are, you will always have people on both sides.

Now let us briefly explore the traps of comparing yourself with these two groups shall we?

THE ONES BETTER THAN YOU:

We often put ourselves in a trap when we begin to judge our successes with the strides of those who have gone ahead of us. We end up always feeling we will never be as good as them. Every great person started somewhere and worked to the top. So learn to appreciate the progressive increase in your capacity. Focus on how you are growing, not how others are far ahead of you. Great achievers learn to learn from others without entering into a race with them.

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THE ONES YOU ARE BETTER THAN:

When we constantly measure ourselves against those we perform better than, we enter into a cycle of constantly settling for results below our best.

Nobody made the ‘C’ you made in that course, but C is not the best you could have gotten.

Everybody on the athletic team sees you as a beast in sprint races because you constantly dust them, but the best time you ever clocked happened last year.

Get off that trap!

Reach out for your best!

Your greatest competition is YOU!

Your story is not a sub-plot of another person’s great story.

Set your own bar, ensure it is not mediocre.